We were so excited, so scared, so innocent. We were having a baby. After a very normal, first time hospital delivery, we were elated and exhausted. Snuggling with my precious little 8 lb boy was blissful.
We were living in Mississippi — far from home and family. Danny was preaching for a congregation in Houston, MS. The people there were (and still are) wonderful. They took us in and treated us as their own.
It was time — we were going to get to take our sweet little David Scott Dow home in the morning. I was so ready to go home. We had had so much fun getting the nursery ready, buying all the little things a newborn baby needs. I went to sleep knowing that all was well and we would be going home in the morning.
That night, everything changed. A doctor came into my room to tell me that our sweet little David was very sick. He had had a seizure and would need to be transferred to the hospital in Jackson, MS — 2 hours away.
The flurry of events that happened next are still very clear in my mind. I won’t go into all the details but I will say that David needed heart surgery or he would not survive. He had surgery on the 26th to replace a portion of his aorta that was missing but his little body just couldn’t hold out. He died on July 28, 1985.
We never did get to take him home with us. Instead we took him to the funeral home and then buried him 2 days later.
It was and still is one of those life altering experiences in my life that has helped mold the person I have become. Here, 27 years later, I think about him and those few short days he was with us and I am sad all over again. Not depressed, not distraught, not hopeless, just sad. I am comforted all over again by the wonderful friends that supported us during that time and by our family that came to help us mourn. I am in awe again at God’s wonderful design. A design that sometimes goes wrong but so many times over and over again, everything works just like it should. I am thankful for the medical community that helped us so gently through the decisions and events that we did not want to be a part of and that we barely understood. I miss you, David, and love you very much and 27 years later still wish you were here with me.
”I know now that we never get over great losses – we absorb them, and they carve us into different , often kinder, creatures. We tell the story to get them back, to capture the traces of footfalls through the snow.” from _Let’s Take the Long Way Home_
I don’t think I ever knew this. You are an amazing person. How can you recount this experience in such a way that makes me feel uplifted in the end? Thanks for sharing. It reminds me yet again how blessed I am on so many levels.
Thank you Cheryl. Today is the day he died, 27 years ago.
Diana,
I remember that time like it was yesterday as well. It all happened so fast that it was hard to grasp. It was one of the saddest days in my life. He looked like a little angel. We know that he will have a glorious life in heaven. I always admired how you and Danny handled that heart breaking few days. You were both troopers. We all love you very much!
Thank you, Beverly. You and your family were a huge encouragement to us not only then but the whole time we lived in Mississippi.
I love all your blogs. This one has a wonderful new look. I will come back and as time permits, read your posts.
I add your blog to my bloglovin to follow it and not miss a thing!
I meant “added”!
Thank you, Silvia!
Diana… I had not read your post when I commented, that is why it sounded so strangely cheerful. I saw the title and thought you were going to recap 27 years of homeschooling.
But your post…
I had a loss before Natalia, at a few weeks of pregnancy. I too remember the day I felt something strange, the rush to the ultrasound office, the experience there and the walks with Steve after, praying, weeping, and wondering what will it come after.
Thanks again for sharing and introducing us to David Scott.
Ha! We haven’t quite hit the 27 year mark with home schooling. We are about to start our 21st though.
Losing a baby at any stage is so difficult. I have had several miscarriages as well so I know the pain that brings. I’m sorry you had to experience it, Silvia.
I, too,was only 10 years old, but I do remember those days just like they were yesterday! I remember very clearly Melissa calling mom and telling her what had happened. I visit David’s grave from time to time (when I visit my grandparents’ grave). Love you and sending a special prayer your way tonight!!!!
Thank you for thinking about him when you visit your grandparents’ grave. The fact that we buried him in Houston makes Houston and all of you there very special to us.
This is beautiful. Your family has been so special to us and is such an example of raising Godly children. Thank you for sharing.
You all mean a lot to us as well. I enjoyed sitting behind your kids in worship today. They are so sweet.
Thank you, Michelle.
Diana,
Although I was just a child(turned 10 that awful week), I still remember like it happened yesterday. Sending hugs and prayers to you and Danny during this time of remembrance :-)