The Widow of Lamentations

“How she sits alone, the city once crowded with people! She who was great among the nations has become like a widow. The princess among the provinces has been put to forced labor.”

Did you catch that? She…has become like a widow. This is the first verse of the first chapter of the book of Lamentations. Yesterday I started copying the book of Lamentations. I have been copying scripture for several years. It has been a rewarding way to study God’s word. I have copied the Pentateuch, most of the books of poetry, some of the minor prophets, and most recently, Luke and John.

After finishing John, I was contemplating what to copy next. I had planned to finish copying the gospels so Matthew or Mark were top on my list, but I had run out of the little notebooks I copy in. I usually pick them up for a good price at Ollie’s. Sadly, this time, Ollie’s failed me. All I found was a notebook with the same dimensions but much fewer pages and, to be honest, not as pretty as what I typically get. I knew there would not be enough pages for the whole book of Matthew, and I might be pushing it to attempt copying Mark in it. What to do? Then I remembered that Lamentations just had 6 chapters. A perfect length for this little notebook. And so, I began.

God has a lot to say about widows. He recognizes their plight. He cares for them and expects others to care for them too.

“A father of the fatherless and a champion of widows is God in His holy dwelling.” Psalm 68:5

“Pure and undefiled religion before God the Father is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress…” James 1:27

“Support widows who are genuinely in need.” 1 Timothy 5:3

Jerusalem, the beautiful city of David, had become so desolate that it was compared to a widow. As one who has recently become a widow, my heart perked up when I read this. What else would God have to say about this widow, Jerusalem? I realize that the point of Lamentations is not to teach us about widowhood, but it is to use something familiar to teach us about Jerusalem. I also realize that what we think we know about widows does not compare to what we learn when we become one. But God knows.

Look at what God says about the widow in the opening verses of Lamentations as He describes the desolation of Jerusalem.

“How she sits alone, the city once crowded with people!” Lamentations 1:1

She sits alone. No matter how many loved ones surround her, she is alone. Her other half is gone. There is no aloneness like the alone a widow feels. God knows.

“The princess among the provinces has been put to forced labor.” Lamentations 1:1

She has been put to forced labor. Now this may not be the case for all widows but for those who have lost the financial support of their husband, she must now work to put food on the table. I can relate to this. I had been blessed to be a “stay at home” mom even after my boys were grown. Compared to many women, I was treated as a princess. Now I must find a way to support myself. God knows.

“She weeps bitterly during the night, with tears on her cheeks. There is no one to offer her comfort…” Lamentations 1:2

She weeps bitterly during the night, with tears on her cheeks. Sleepless nights are now the norm. Whereas I once felt safe and loved, I now find myself waking in the night with thoughts running through my head of things I must do, regrets for decisions I have made, and just the magnitude and permanence of my new situation. And there is no one there to comfort me. God knows.

“Her young women grieve, and she herself is bitter.” Lamentations 1:4

She herself is bitter. Oh, how I do not want to fall into this mindset. It would be so easy to become bitter and resent those who have what I have lost. It is a prayer I utter during those sleepless nights and times of deep sorrow. God knows.

“During the days of her affliction and homelessness Jerusalem remembers all her precious belongings that were hers in days of old.” Lamentations 1:7

Afflicted and homeless. That is the condition some of us have found ourselves in. Daily I find myself thinking about some trinket or valued item that I used to own that I no longer have. Something as simple as that little gadget that helped me open jars. Where is it? Oh yes. It must have been tossed along with many other things I left behind. Or something as prominent in my home as the dining room table that I sold for far less than it was worth. Precious things that were mine in days of old. I think about them and sigh knowing that they were just things, but they were my things. God knows.

Being a widow is hard. It is different than losing a parent or even a child. I know, I have lost both a parent and a child. Losing a husband changes everything. My identity as his wife, a preacher’s wife, one part of a pair. Forty-two years of walking by his side, sitting next to him in church, riding in the car with him, eating meals with him, celebrating holidays with him, sleeping next to him. Every decision, every activity over the past 42 years has always included Danny. Who am I now? God knows.

This puts a whole new light on the condition of Jerusalem for me. Previously, I would read these words and think I knew what it was talking about. Now I know what it is talking about. It is reassuring knowing how much God loved Jerusalem and its people. He loves me the same and understands my plight. God knows.

After copying the first half of chapter one I remembered that Danny, Andrew, and Pat had studied Lamentations live on Facebook a few years back. I found the video and went to sleep that night listening to them talking about Jerusalem being described as a widow. What a comfort it was to hear Danny’s voice again. To hear him doing what he loved to do. For a few minutes I felt a little less alone.