Our family is musical. There is always some instrument being practiced, some rehearsal to go to, some composition being worked on, even some instrument being made. It makes for a pretty noisy house at times and sometimes that noise isn’t all that pretty. That’s okay, because the end result is usually beautiful.
My older boys were interested in music but they also were very interested in baseball. I found it interesting that the coach’s kid always seemed to be the best player on the team. In the early days, I figured it was because the coach gave preference to his child. After watching many coaches and their kids, I realized that was not usually the case. The coach’s kid was just very good at baseball. Was it in their genes? Was it because the coach forced his son to practice all the time? What made him better than the other kids?
The answer to those questions is the same answer as to how my kids are so musical. The coach loved baseball. The coach watched baseball. The coach played baseball. The coach talked about baseball. The coach shared all of this with his son at an early age. Baseball became part of his life. He wasn’t forced into it. He just grew up with it. He understood the game. He saw good players play. He loved the game because his dad loved the game.
It’s the same with any activity a father/mother shares with his/her son/daughter. A dad that is a big hunter is going to have kids that love hunting. A mother that loves to cook will have kids that learn to be great cooks. A parent that loves to read will have a strong reader and so on. This doesn’t just happen. A parent that loves to read will not have a strong reader unless he shares his love of reading with his child. He must teach his child to read. He must read to his child. His child must see him reading for his own enjoyment.
So how does this apply to my children and music? My kids are surrounded by music from an early age. Not only have they heard me play the violin/piano, they have heard my students during their private lessons. I have tried to expose them to music of all genres when possible. Just like the baseball coach, we talk about and play music together. It happens naturally.
What can a parent do to encourage a love of music with their own children? Especially if music is not their thing? Some things can be done at a very early age. Things that you might not think would help with musical ability but I think instills a sense of rhythm and offers ear training when the baby is very small. Both of these skills are so important when learning to sing or to play an instrument. Learning it at an early age makes it all so much easier when the time comes to actually put an instrument in their hands.
Here are 3 things I have done with my children:
Pat. The other night, I was holding a friend’s baby during a rehearsal. He was about 4 months old. I did with him what I always did with all my own boys. I held him up on my shoulder and patted his bottom. Not just any old patting but patting his bottom with the beat of the music. Easy enough to do and can be done anytime there is music around. You can even do it while singing to your baby.
Sing. That brings me to the second thing. Sing to your baby. It doesn’t matter what you sing. Contrary to popular belief, there is no magic in Mozart. Just sing. Make up songs. Sing folk songs and lullabies. Sing songs you grew up with. Pat his little bottom in time with what you’re singing. Not a singer? Listen to a CD with your baby. Sing along. I believe everyone can improve their singing skills with practice.
Listen. Listen to great music. Invest in some of the wonderful CDs that are available. Play one when your baby is going to sleep. Play them in the car. Listen to great music as often as possible. You can be the judge of what great music is. Hymns, folk songs, classical music, golden oldies, country/western. All of it has its place and all of it can be enjoyed by you and your child. As both of you are listening, your sense of rhythm is being developed, your ear is being trained, your taste for beautiful music is maturing.
None of these suggestions are all that difficult. Of course, that’s what the baseball coach said to us when he tried to encourage us to work with our boys at home on their baseball skills. I realize it may come easier to me to sing spontaneously than to someone who has not done much singing but I encourage you to give it a try. As your child gets older, take him out to concerts and let him see the performers in action. Colleges and Universities that have music programs have lots and lots of opportunities for you to share these experiences with your child. Check out the one nearest you and make the effort to attend a couple this semester. Try a percussion concert or a tuba recital. Introduce your child to all kinds of instruments and all kinds of music.
What about formal music education? I am frequently asked what age to start. I know lots of people start their little ones as young as 3 playing the violin. I don’t recommend it. I think 3 year olds need to be playing not practicing. If you want to get a child that young involved in a music program, choose one of the mommy and me type programs that involve mom and child doing fun music activities in a group setting. I recommend starting on the piano at or around age 7. Your child may be able to handle private piano lessons at an earlier age but if not, don’t worry about it. I like my private students to be able to sit for a 30 minute lesson and remember what they learned once they get home. If they can’t do this, they may not be ready for private lessons yet. After 2 or 3 years on the piano, if you would like for them to play the violin or another instrument, that would be great.
Why piano first? 1) Piano, although not an easy instrument to play at the higher levels, is relatively easy to learn as a beginner. You can be assured that if you press down the correct key, it will be the correct note. No guessing. This will give your child’s ear the chance to learn how the notes will sound. 2) A piano student learns to read music on both the bass and treble clefs. Once reading these clefs have been mastered, picking any instrument (except maybe the viola) will be much easier. 3) Piano students tend to learn more music theory than, partly because they are learning both clefs, than a student learning the violin or cello. Everything is easier to visualize on the piano. It’s easy to see a scale and to understand what a half step and whole step looks like.
To sum it up? Think like a baseball coach — love music, listen to music, play/sing music, talk about music, go to music performances. Your child can’t help but be interested in something that you’re interested in.
Update added 10/12/12: After writing this, I discovered a website with some wonderful Youtube videos to help get you started encouraging your children in music and possibly even starting on the violin yourself. Check out Heather Broadbent’s video: Music Games For Toddlers
Heather Broadbent
Thank you so much for referring my blog. I am very glad you found it to be helpful. Please let me know of any thoughts or suggestions you would like for future blogs. Here is the link to sign up to my newsletter to stay updated with future posts.
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Heather Broadbent
Diana
Hi Heather, I recently shared your blog with a piano teacher who is just beginning to skype music lessons. I also shared a link to your Youtube recital with a student of mine. I believe I found you on Violinist.com.
Cheryl Black
Love the post! Brie begged for piano lessons for about 6 months. A month or so before she turned 5 we signed up with a good friend and neighbor. She loved it. She took for a couple of years. I attempted to continue teaching her as we homeschooled but I wasn’t very consistent. She entered public school in 4th grade. Then in 5th grade she begged to join the 5th grade strings program. (My initial thought was…why don’t we continue piano. We HAVE a piano!) But she joined and never looked back ending up majoring in music in college with violin as her instrument…no other stringed instrument would do! As her knowledge increased, one day in high school she said, “Mom, you don’t know near as much about music as I thought you did!” But I love music, as does her dad. She heard singing from the time her ears could hear before she was born. We calmed her with singing “O Sole Mio” when she cried in her car seat (granted only the first few measures since that is all we knew!). We took her to concerts at Miller Theatre as an infant; I sang her to sleep every night. I grew up in a hymn-loving household and could just never imagine NOT singing. I’m impressed with people who don’t have that background who work hard to make it happen for their children. I love that our God put music into our hearts and made it such an important part of our worship to Him. I get chills thinking of what the sound must be in heaven.
Diana
Sounds like you did it right! It’s sad when they realize we don’t know everything, isn’t it? Then, it’s rewarding when they grow up and realize we knew more than they thought we did. My boys thought I was crazy half the time when they were in my orchestra. Then, they began to get involved in other orchestras. I love to sit in on these rehearsals and hear the conductors say the same things I was saying. Kind of makes me feel validated.
Silvia
Oh…. great post! You are right. I do not have any musical background, but instinctively I did and do those things with my girls because I do love music at the recipient’s end of it. Now we got our digital piano… I am the first one practicing and loving it! And Natalia, just eight, has started piano lessons and not only does she sit and pay attention, she values them and takes the lessons and practice seriously. I know my youngest could do lessons too, but I will wait one more year until she is seven for sure! My girls love Mike Oldfield, Bach and Vivaldi, ha ha ha, and we three LOVE to sing hymns. That is not only beautiful and required by God, we learn from it and enjoy it dearly.
BTW, after having the piano I was listening to classic music, a piece by Paganini, on the radio, and got to appreciate the difficulty and mastery required much more. And simply learning Twinkle Twinkle and Mary Had a Little Lamb with chords, now I DO UNDERSTAND why composers who songs like these… to torture us, ha ha ha, noooooo, to practice basic notes and chords, and to learn while also being able to play something beautiful.
You are the second person (the other person who said this too was my friend’s mother in law, an accomplished pianist), who said that piano is the basis for other instruments and one worth starting on when we learn music.
Being GENUINELY enthus about something is key. You have said the same about the Bible and christian life. I add one thing. Respecting children times. I have been slightly impatient with my oldest now just eight, I could not see the day when she would read from her own initiative, and just now she is doing so. We should not do something and expect they will follow suit at the same instant. It is worth to try to cultivate love and passion for things in us before expecting our children to show that (which they may very well have on their own too, but most times it happens after our love and passion is lived in their presence).
Diana
I think it’s wonderful that you are learning the piano along with your kids. That’s a great example to them that learning is a lifelong activity and that they should not be afraid to learn something new.
Thank you for mentioning that we need to let our children learn on their schedule. Not only that but we need to accept the fact that not all children will grasp our love of a subject to the extent that we love it. Out of my 6 boys, all of them can play the piano but not all of them play it at the level I would like for them to. I taught them and allowed them to progress further if they chose, choose another instrument if they were interested and backed off if they weren’t.
Diana
You mentioned that composers like to torture us. Composers have been accused of this by many musicians. You need to get The Composer Is Dead to share with your family. It is a piece written to introduce the audience to the orchestra in a fun way. The narration was written by Lemony Snicket — author of a Series of Unfortunate Events. The Orchestra of the Pines played it last year. It was a fun piece. Here’s a link to it on Amazon: The Composer Is Dead