Whatever State I Am

Life is hard. If it’s not one thing, it’s another. Sometimes it just seems too much for anyone to endure. Whether it is financial problems or health problems or family problems or are grieving a loss that is unbearable, it is hard. So, what’s a person to do?

The easy thing is to give up, walk away, wash my hands of the whole matter. The easy thing is to put my wants, my desires, my goals, my life at the top of the priority list because, after all, there ain’t nobody gonna take care of me except me, right?

When I go through these trials, everyone else’s lives seem so much better than mine. With smiles on their faces, my friends and acquaintances all seem to live such carefree lives. It does not matter that if I would sit down and talk to them, really talk to them, I would find out that they have been through the same and maybe even more difficult trials I am going through. Right now, I could make a list of people I personally know who have recently dealt with the death of a loved one, the loss of a baby, the birth of a baby with special needs, an aging parent, a loved one making poor life choices, personal health problems, a broken marriage, loneliness, fear, rejection. The list could go on and on.

Do you know what is similar in each of these situations? Not one of these people on my list planned for this to happen to them. None of them, when they started a family said, “I would like my child to have severe health problems.” None of them, on their wedding day said, “I want this marriage to end in divorce.” None of them said, “I want my parent to have dementia.” None of them said, “I want to live in fear of what might happen tomorrow.” Knowing all of these people, I can say with confidence that they all had plans for a long, prosperous, happy life without any difficulties getting in the way.

I see some of the people on my list falling apart, giving in, giving up and doing what the world has told us to do — put ourselves first. Is my marriage falling apart? My promise to this person is not important. Take care of “me”. That is all that really matters. If I don’t take care of myself, who will? These are the people who are the most unhappy. While it sounds appealing to look out for #1, the truth is that none of us are happy when we are selfish and self-centered.

I see some of the people on my list giving of their resources, time, and money but they do so grudgingly. They really do not want to give up anything for the current trial but they feel obligated so they will do it. Obligation is not a bad thing unless it is the only motivation to do the right thing. Helping others, making the right choices just because it is expected leaves these people bitter and angry. It’s a matter of the heart. They are doing the same work, but the condition of their heart makes all the difference.

I see some of the people on my list thriving in spite of the trials they face. These people are such an inspiration. Does a family member need extra help because of age or a disability or declining health? I see these people jumping in there and giving their all to help make this person’s life better. Of course, they would have preferred to keep going with their career or with their life plan, but someone needs them, and they drop everything to give their all. These are the happy people on my list. Maybe happy isn’t the best word. These are the people who experience peace and contentment which allows someone to be happy in whatever situation they find themselves in.

So, which do I want to be? Which do you want to be? Self-centered and selfish or bitter and angry or peaceful and content?

Giving up something for someone else. Sounds like the way Jesus lived and died for us. Sounds like the life He wants us to live. Sounds like the way we can glorify and praise and honor the Lord our God.

It is so much bigger than us. When we choose to do the hard thing, the thing that requires us to put a halt to our plans and desires, the thing that makes us step out of our comfort zone, we are learning to be who God wants us to be. We are learning to live the Christian life. We are learning that the things that happen here on earth are not nearly as important as the eternal life we are looking forward to. It is not about my career, my financial goals, my hobbies, and things that make me happy. It is about loving others and living for Christ.

And when it seems like it is too much, like I just can’t go on anymore, remember:

“He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength.” (Isaiah 40:29)

I can look to the example Paul left us. He did not ask to be the teacher of the gospel to the Gentiles. He was happy with his life. He was a Jew of Jews. Why would he want to give up all he had worked for to teach people who he did not even like? That is exactly what God told Paul to do. Change directions completely to help others and to please God.

Paul left us these words of wisdom in Philippians 4:11:

Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things, I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Other passages to consider:

Philippians 4:6-7 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

1 Corinthians 4:7-12 But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed — always carrying about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body. For we who live are always delivered to death for Jesus’ sake, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. So, then death is working in us, but life in you.

James 4:13-15 Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit”; whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. Instead, you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.”

Diana